Everyone wants once-in-a-lifetime love, but experience shows that this is a rare occurrence in a harsh reality. Over the last 50 years, people in Europe have begun to divorce 2.5 times more frequently and marry 2 times less frequently. The good news is that foreseeing a divorce is probable, and scientific evidence confirms it.
We wish for a future where there are more peaceful and strong families. That's why we combed through a lot of studies and identified the 9 most distinct divorce forerunners discovered by scientists.
1. The number of smiles in their childhood photos
Psychologists performed a series of experiments to see whether it is possible to predict divorce based on childhood and youthful images. In one study, scientists measured the strength of smiles on a scale of 1 to 10 using photographs from a college yearbook. The test involved stretching two muscles: one clenched the jaw, while the other produced wrinkles around the eyes.
There were no divorces among those whose smiles were scored a "10." Among the frowners, every fourth person got divorced at the same time. In general, people who appear depressed in photographs are 5 times more likely to divorce than those who smile.
2. The emotional tone of their voice
Using only the sound of the spouses' voices when interacting with each other, a computer algorithm can predict the success of a marriage with a 79 per cent accuracy. Scientists studied the conversations of over 100 couples who were seeing a counsellor and followed their marital status for five years.
Intensity, pitch, "jitter," and "shimmer" can all be used to show powerful emotions. "It is not only what you say that matters; it is also how you say it that matters. This holds true for a couple's partnership as well, according to the researchers.
3. Colleagues of the opposite s*x
According to Danish researchers, people who work exclusively with people of the opposite sex are 15 per cent more likely to divorce. When they researched all of the couples who married in Denmark between 1981 and 2002, they were able to look at the problem on a larger scale. They discovered that a million of them had already divorced.
4. Mother's upbringing
Women are more likely to file for divorce than men. Furthermore, studies have shown that most couples model their behaviour after that of their parents, especially their mothers. Sociologists looked at the actions of 7,000 people and discovered that when a mother entered a new relationship (whether it was marriage or just cohabitation), their adult children acted similarly.
5. Ignoring conflicts
Disdain, victimhood, opponents, and ignoring disputes are four signs of a potential divorce, according to John Gottman. The "Four Horseman of the Apocalypse" can seem harmless at first glance, but in reality, it is a very dangerous behavioural tactic. Imagine you're all set for a heated argument on a subject that's been bothering you for a while, The conversation unexpectedly comes to a halt.
It may seem that spouses can keep the peace by doing so, but this is incorrect. While debates and quarrels aren't the most fun aspects of conversation, they do help to cross all the t's. They are expected to address the outstanding issues. If these situations are overlooked, more and more frustrations will emerge.
6. A husband's negative attitude toward his wife's friends
Over the course of 16 years of marriage, scientists researched the relationships of 373 couples. By their 16th year of marriage, 46 per cent of couples had divorced, and oftentimes, the husband's criticism of his wife's friends in the first year of their marriage foreshadowed a potential split.
According to scientists, this is due to the fact that female-female friendships last longer because of emotional closeness and encouragement, while male friendships are most often based on joint activities. As a result, it is easier for men to shift their communication circle and more difficult for them to come to terms with their wife's mates, whom they dislike.
7. Newlyweds' excessive affection toward each other
Ted Huston, a psychologist, looked at 168 couples who had been together for less than 13 years. "When they were newlyweds, the couples who got divorced 7 or more years later showed almost 1/3 more love for each other than spouses in more stable marriages," according to the findings, which were published in the Interpersonal Relations and Group Processes journal in 2001.
This is because couples who began a relationship with strong romantic feelings were more likely to split up because keeping the strength of those feelings was difficult for them. "Believe it or not, marriages with less 'Hollywood romance' start off with a greater chance of succeeding," says expert Aviva Patz.
8. Poverty and unemployment
It goes without saying that living in difficult circumstances is difficult. These families' relationships break down more often than families that are financially secure. It's verified by Bob Birrell, co-author of a report on financial results for parents after divorce.
"People believe the scheme works in a draconian fashion to take money from men's wallets. The fact is that most separated and divorced men have such low incomes that they contribute very little to the mother's and children's well-being.'
9. Narrow bed
For their mental and physical well-being, good sleep, and a safe family environment, spouses should sleep separately or on a very large bed. Scientists researching sleep disorders discovered that 30-40% of couples sleep in separate beds. That's actually a good thing because poor sleep can lead to divorce. As a consequence, if you want to keep your relationship safe, make sure you get enough sleep.
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