Pornography is not real, yet it keeps shaping our sex life.
Porn is not all it's cracked up to be.
Porn is used to stimulate and arouse either one person or a couple to engage in sexual activities. The focus of porn is aesthetics, and it's not how sex is.
1. Lights, camera, action
What most people fail to realise is that porn is a massive production. It is filmed in days. It has a screenplay writer and directors just like other movies. Hours and days are spent shooting, and then it's edited.
Even OnlyFans which has become massively popular is still a production.
OnlyFans is an exclusive subscription to a person or two people performing sexual acts. But do you know people spend hours curating what is eventually sent out as pornography?
2. Arousal and erections are exaggerated
Most of them use drugs and substances to maintain their erections and libido for so long. There are rumours of others having sex with their real partners first, so they can get aroused.
In real life, there has to be a lot of foreplay for both the man and especially the woman to get aroused. Women need about 30 minutes of foreplay involving kissing, sucking, massage, oral sex, etc before they can be properly aroused for sex.
3. Squirting is unpopular
Many women do not squirt, expelling liquid from their vagina when their g-spot is reached. Very few women experience female ejaculation, but what porn does is create some sort of expectation that women may never meet up with. Do you know that porn stars fill their vaginas with water, so they can create videos of squirting? Plus, you don't need to squirt to have great sex.
4. Good camera angles and some sex positions are not always realistic
Porn is different from how real-life bodies look, move, and react because camera angles, lighting, and other techniques are used.
Sex is meant to be enjoyed not endured. Some positions are not realistic for sex to be enjoyed, especially from the women's perspective.
They might look like they are enjoying it, but they are just acting. Plus, you don't hurt yourself trying to recreate what cannot be done in one take.
Of course, you should be voyeuristic and try different positions but do what works for you.
5. Porn is a performance
Because porn is a performance, when people have sex, they are performing too.
The violence, the sounds and how fast porn is not real. Not many people are being choked, and many women don't make faces like that. Sometimes, you have to go fast or slow, depending on what your partner wants. She doesn't have to moan in a certain way or make a certain face - just like a porn star.
If we remove what we learn from porn from our sexual dictionary, we might have better and even more authentic sex.
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